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-   -   Well, I'd like to leave you with a joke… (http://lecter.org/forum/showthread.php?t=67)

Lecter 07-27-2004 09:44 PM

Well, I'd like to leave you with a joke…
 
Flowers, $25—reluctant.

Wining and dining, $150—catastrophic.

Trying to get on first base—unobtainable.

For everything else, there is Masturbating.

—Jay London

Lecter 09-08-2004 08:50 PM

Re: Well, I'd like to leave you with a joke…
 
Food has replaced sex in my life, and now I can't get in my own pants.

—Jay London

Lecter 08-01-2006 10:39 PM

Re: Well, I'd like to leave you with a joke…
 
I don't have to worry about identity theft—nobody would want to be me.

—Jay London

Lecter 08-01-2006 10:40 PM

Re: Well, I'd like to leave you with a joke…
 
I'm on performance enhancing drugs so I may cause drowsiness.

—Jay London

Lecter 08-01-2006 10:42 PM

Re: Well, I'd like to leave you with a joke…
 
I'm using medicinal marijuana for constipation.

And my doctor told me to shit or get off the pot.

—Jay London

Lecter 04-25-2008 10:29 AM

Re: Well, I'd like to leave you with a joke…
 
My father would take me to the playground, and put me on mood swings.

—Jay London

Lecter 08-19-2008 10:49 AM

Re: Well, I'd like to leave you with a joke…
 
"I saw a stationery store move."

—Jay London

Lecter 10-06-2008 08:42 PM

Re: Well, I'd like to leave you with a joke…
 
Today I videotaped my hair, tonight I'm going to look at the highlights.

—Jay London

Lecter 10-06-2008 08:43 PM

Re: Well, I'd like to leave you with a joke…
 
My girlfriend bought me a down jacket - she said it fit my personality.

—Jay London

Lecter 10-06-2008 08:46 PM

Re: Well, I'd like to leave you with a joke…
 
I went to a pastry store and I bought lady fingers, and when I got home, I noticed that one of the fingers was missing.

So I went back to the store and the manager was nice enough to give me the finger.

—Jay London

Lecter 10-06-2008 08:46 PM

Re: Well, I'd like to leave you with a joke…
 
I bought hot pockets today and there was lint in them.

—Jay London

Lecter 10-06-2008 08:47 PM

Re: Well, I'd like to leave you with a joke…
 
You know, it was a year ago today?

—Jay London

Lecter 10-06-2008 08:49 PM

Re: Well, I'd like to leave you with a joke…
 
You know they have ribbed condoms now, and they come with a BBQ sauce?

—Jay London


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